Dear Eye-Rollers

True, things have drastically improved as my ADHD child has matured and upped her Concerta dosage, but I still fall victim to the judgment of shameless eye-rollers now and then when out in public with my sweet girl. Here's what you should consider before you judge the next frazzled mom you see.

1. If you don't have kids, keep your high minded, under-experienced opinions to yourself. In a perfect world all kids would be just like the ones you see in clothing commercials: perfectly groomed and well-behaved. In the real world, it took 200 takes to get that baby to look "normal" for 5 seconds. You'll figure it out approximately 22 months after you give birth. Until then, keep quiet lest karma decide to take hard core revenge in the form of your future little "angel." FYI - children under the age of five who never act up in public are not the norm!
2. If I waited until my ADHD-suffering child were in a publicly-acceptable mood, I'd never leave the house. Children with ADHD are unpredictable well into their teens, on or off their meds. Nothing I do short of a horse tranquilizer will change that. (I'm pretty sure using the tranquilizer on an 11-year-old is illegal.) Since I must leave the house in order to obtain critical supplies like food and hard core cleaners, and as I am devoid of any adult back-up 99% of the time, you will simply have to tolerate the fact that my sweet angel does not comprehend the difference between an inside or outside voice or a store aisle versus a dance stage. Given she is both very funny and a talented dancer, maybe you should pull the stick out of your butt, smile and enjoy the free entertainment rather than lament the disruption of the phone call you chose to take in the middle of Walmart on a busy Saturday.
3. If you see me correcting my child in public, thank your lucky stars I know how to avert the full on nuclear meltdown before it occurs, taking down 400 cans of salty vegetables and a row of metal display shelves at its peak. Understand that my child doesn't respond to a quiet "don't do that" and the tone of voice and body language I employ are not only necessary but recommended by a trained professional. Get over it. In fact, avert your eyes and walk on by to ensure you don't inadvertently reinitiate the self-destruct sequence.
4. I live with this kid. My nerves are already shot. You could be the last straw that sends me over the edge and consequently the victim of my meltdown given I would never let loose on the child I love with all my heart. For your own personal safety, show some mercy and compassion for mothers with kids who don't fit the normal mold.
5. Even normal kids have ill-timed moments of exuberance. Given children are necessary to the continuation of the human species, it would serve you well to accept that fact and maybe even learn to glean a little joy from their happiness. Meanwhile, us over-worked, under-appreciated moms will continue to do our best to teach our progeny the appropriate times to sing a concerto knowing those lessons won't likely take until well after we've become grandparents.

Yours Truly,
Fractured Mom