More and more news stories are popping up about boys demanding to be allowed access to girls' locker rooms in schools around the country and idiotic school administrators agreeing to this insanity. Not to mention a reported outlandish Obama administration initiative to force acceptance of "transgender" teens into restrooms and locker rooms they're not biologically designed to use. (Tip to these idiots, studies show 70-80% of kids who go through gender issues spontaneously return to their biological gender identity by adulthood.) Yeah, strong words, I know. However, I'm the mother of an 11-year-old girl and, despite my diversity champ background, I have to say my mama bear hackles are not only up but in full defense mode at this point.
Even if we choose to completely ignore biology when it comes to discussing gender in the interest of making sure the less than 2% of society who suffer gender identity issues get what they want, there is a simple fact that physically boys and girls are different and seeing each other naked can cause some serious trauma for most teens. Geez, my daughter, who used to run the house buck-naked during her Bohemian pre-school years, has a hard time changing costumes in front of the other girls in her dance group, let alone in front of a guy. And she's not alone.
From 11-18 are the most difficult years for girls when it comes to body image, privacy, and self-image. Puberty does some wacky things to kids' minds. Most girls become more self-conscious while they come to grips with their developing and ever-changing bodies. I used to hide behind my locker door or in a bathroom stall to change for athletics because I had almost no body fat which translated to a boy-like body during my early high school years. Not only did I not want boys to see my flat chest and lack of curves, but I didn't want my female peers to see it, either. The only saving grace was that most of the girls on my basketball team were built like me and eventually I became a LITTLE more comfortable with those curves that seemed so slow to arrive.
But even now, in my 40's and having seen more than one bare male body part in my life time, it's not something I want forced on me or my child at random. I remember recently getting off a plane after a really long day and, in my state of exhaustion, accidentally wandering into the men's room at the airport. Luckily, before I'd gone too far, a man who was exiting pointed out my mistake. I looked up to see men standing all around the room in front of me in various states of dress, luckily with their backs to me. My face turned deep red and my stomach flip-flopped. I was horrified and embarrassed. I ducked my head and quickly exited, retreating into the ladies' room which was just a zig from my accidental zag. (I loathe open, barely marked restroom entrances, by the way.) Not only was I embarrassed, but so was the man who bumped into me, which tells me we all expect some level of privacy in the restroom. At least from seeing or being seen by the opposite sex.
That being said, for their own protection we teach our little girls to keep their privates private. We empower young ladies to own their bodies and feel confident that they get to decide who gets to see what and when. Again, this is
for their own protection and psychological well-being, not for some bent religious reason but because studies and statistics have proven it is necessary.
I feel bad for those kids who are confused about their gender. I really do. But not bad enough to allow their confusion to traumatize the many young ladies who are barely coming to grips with what it means to be a biological female in front of others who are actually experiencing the same transition into adulthood. Hair in new places, growing breasts, good curves, bad curves, pads & tampons - these are all new things teens are dealing with during the delicate process of going from girl to woman. The LAST THING they want is to be subjected to some BOY'S THING during that process. And let's face it, those things aren't pretty, which could scar some girls for life if forced to see them before they're ready. Accommodating a confused boy who is, again, 70-80% likely to change his mind about wanting to be a girl before reaching adulthood, is NOT a valid excuse for traumatizing hundreds of young ladies by forcing them to disrobe in front of him in order to get to PE on time. "Feeling like" or "identifying as" a girl does not a girl make. Lack of a penis is what qualifies one to use the girls' room in any facility designed for the explicit use of minors or barely legal FEMALE teens.
Should schools attempt to accommodate the gender confused when the issue arises? Absolutely! But only in a way that is considerate of the majority of students who understand that gender is biologically defined by the plumbing you were equipped with at birth. Well, that and the gametes your body produces to match that plumbing. Equality implies providing equal protection to all, not bowing to the demands of one or two who choose to be different. Allowing young men who wear dresses into the girls' locker room isn't going to improve life for anyone involved. It's not going to make that young man feel better about himself, and is more likely to have the effect of increasing his identity issues and depression when he sees girls developing the body parts naturally that he can only obtain through expensive surgery. Having been a girl who saw a young man's body part for the first time, I can assure you the locker room is not the time and place to introduce the franks and beans to a young woman. So, in short, accommodation should include access to private locker rooms and restrooms if the transgender teen isn't comfortable changing among his or her biological gender peers. Providing access to the opposite gender's areas is NOT the solution and would only do more harm than good for both the transgender and those who have to share a room with him or her.
While the science is not conclusive, there are multiple on-going studies linking the early on-set of puberty as well as deviant, dangerous or even criminal sexual behavior to early exposure to images of opposite sex or sexually-explicit nudity. (Parental nudity at a very young age being the exception.) In case you're wondering - this is not healthy.
Another personal story: I accidentally walked in on my dad sleeping in his tighty whities during my early teen years. There was a tent. I was never quite the same and, roughly thirty years later have yet to successfully eradicate that image from my mind. I would not wish that on any other young girl for any reason. Ever. And that's all I have to say about that.
